Hail the Conquering Hero

I hate to prematurely toot my own horn, because this cake has yet to be cut into and eaten, but this photo at least proves that a cake I made and frosted existed in a perfect form. Once it was iced, I admit I started to get a little paranoid about inadvertently destroying it. I thought, "What if the roses have bugs in them that come out of the petals during the night and devour the cake?" Then when I was carrying it out the door of my apartment, down the steps, opening the garage (yikes) and placing it in the passenger seat, I imagined dropping it flat on its beautiful face.

The cake is currently safe and sound in my parents' fridge (in anticipation of my sister Allison's going away party tonight), that is until my sister Emily wakes up and runs her little fingers through the icing. She's probably doing it right now! She did. She licked it. Supposedly, you can't tell. Now if she could only resist taking another taste for the next eight hours--it's impossible. Once Allison wakes up, she'll try it. And then once my mom gets home from work, she's going to lick it too. These people have no control! The cake will probably be gone by the time the party starts! Because the cake is that good.

I made the same batter recipe as last time because it was just that splendid--just barely flavored with almond and orange, barely barely sweet. A couple days ago, I caved and bought Martha Stewart's Baking Handbook. This time, for the frosting, I followed the directions exactly. I read the recipes in advance and purchased two dozen eggs in order to have enough for the batter and the frosting. I heated the egg whites in a double boiler, using a candy thermometer to exactly 160 degrees and to the point at which the sugar had completely dissolved. I transferred the egg-sugar mixture to the KitchenAid and mixed until it doubled in size and fluffed out. The sugar gave the whipped egg whites a glistening sheen. It became sticky and gooey, sort of like a marshmallow. Adding the butter, tablespoon at a time, the frosting went from goo to cream. Soft, smooth, not-too-sweet. Completely glorious.

Those of you who aren't fond of cakes--you haven't had this cake. Martha Stewart and her team of chefs are genius. I was having a borderline spiritual experience in the kitchen last night, whipping butter, egg whites and sugar into submission. It was like the clouds parted and angels burst out in the Hallelujah chorus. The cake held the frosting, nothing broke, melted or crumbled to pieces. Swirls of spackle held the layers together, enticing onlookers. This cake wants to be licked, cut apart and enjoyed. It wants to be eaten.

Swiss Meringue Buttercream Frosting: from Martha Stewart's Baking Handbook

4 egg whites

1 1/4 cup granulated sugar

1 1/2 cups unsalted butter (at room temperature)

1 teaspoon vanilla (I also added almond extract)

Bring a pot of water to a boil, then reduce heat to a simmer. In a separate heat-proof bowl combine egg whites and sugar. Place heat-proof bowl in the simmering water. Begin whisking and do so continuously until the sugar has dissolved. Using a thermometer, whisk until the egg mixture reaches 160 degrees. Remove from heat. Using the whisk attachment (still obsessed with my KitchenAid), beat the egg whites until they are stiff but not dry and let cool while you're mixing (takes about 6 minutes according to Martha's directions).

Switch to the padder attachment on the mixer. Mix in the butter a couple tablespoons at a time until the frosting is creamy and smooth. Martha directs that if the butter separates from the whites, kick up the mixer speed until it unifies. Before finishing, turn the mixer on the lowest speed to remove air bubbles. Before icing the cake, mix with a spatula to remove more air bubbles. Expect the frosting process to make quite a mess--this means you've done a good job.

The Meltdown

I'd like to blame some abstract cosmic force who is obviously working against me in the kitchen, but it's me. It's all me. I have an inability to follow directions. I don't plan on it. It just happens. I get to the bottom of the ingredient list and think "SIX egg whites! I have this meringue powder that should be a perfect substitute." And there it is. I've strayed ever so slightly from the instructions down the precipice and into the canyon.

Difficulty arose with my stubborn refusal to make another batch of hideous frosting. That buttercream frosting truly makes me want to yack. There was no way I was going to make an entire cake that I didn't want to eat. So I went to who we all know is the master of home baking: Ms. Martha Stewart. I decided upon her orange-almond cake with Swiss meringue buttercream--a buttercream recipe that calls for actual butter not Crisco. Using my new KitchenAid mixer (!) I whipped up the most delicious batter. The recipe calls for folding in egg whites--who knew how glorious egg whites could be when whipped to a frothy tower! So easy with the KitchenAid. The orange gave just a touch of zing to the moist cake littered with barely noticeable crunches of almond. For a filling, I used the remainer of the strawberry-peach-orange jam I made last summer.

I made an orange-flavored crumb coat, and moved on to the frosting while the crumb coat dried. We already know I substituted meringue powder for egg whites in the Swiss buttercream recipe--to my eventual detriment. But the frosting went on fairly smoothly, plus it's edible. A touch on the too-sweet side, but a fine balence when teamed with the cake. And I made the traditional buttercream frosting for the decorating portion of the cake--thank goodness. My sister Allison was standing by in case disaster struck but more to witness an emotional breakdown.

I carefully hauled my cake to the decorating class, taking every turn at calculated pace. One member of the class was not so lucky as I. By the time I waltzed into the classroom cake in hand, Desiree was red-faced and grumbling. Her cake broke en route--the top separated from the bottom and she was busy spackling it back together with the loathed buttercream. I offered a simpathetic glance and we mumbled about how horrible the frosting tastes--her fix was to substitute lemon juice for the water in the recipe (an excellent idea).

Together I and Desiree (my cake-decorating kindred spirit) fumbled through the final session. Once I coaxed my icing away from neon hues, I aced the roses. Desiree struggled with cabbage-like constructions until the light bulb clicked, and she got it too. I mastered the sweet pea, the simple rose bud, the leaf and the ribbon with almost no tribulation. Transferring my skills to the cake was more of a challenge, but it came out pretty well. I was the first one in the class finished with my cake, received my "diploma" and headed out to meet up with friends. I would trade my spendid cake for a meal of stir-fry.

I precariously balenced my cake in the front seat next to me and drove off. A little frosting transferred to my purse, so whilst driving I lifted the cake and balenced it in my right hand and steered with my left. There I was driving down Center Street with a cake in one hand. Not five minutes into the drive, I noticed that the butter-based icing was indeed melting in the 85-degree evening heat. My green-dot border was not-so-slowly sliding down the side of the cake and onto the stand and my arm. At a red light, I placed the cake back in the passenger seat. I couldn't have cried--it was too funny. I'm a lost cause with the cakes. If only Desiree could have seen me, she would have felt so much better about her own cake. I parked quickly at Dan's and ran up without even grabbing my purse. Once inside, Laura and Adam licked off the dripping frosting with their fingers while Dan snapped a quick photo (below). Such a delicious disaster.

Here are only the successful portions of the recipes, including the buttercream, which does taste horendous but works great with the roses.

Orange-almond Cake:

1 cup butter plus more to grease pans

1 1/2 cups flour (sifted)

1 cup plus 3 tablespoons sugar

6 large eggs, separated

orange zest from 2 oranges (I skipped this)

2/3 cup orange juice

1/2 teaspoon almond extract

1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 cup coarsely ground almonds

pinch of salt

Preheat the oven to 350. Grease two 8- or 9-inch baking rounds and sprinkle with flour (that's a new trick I learned). Set aside.

In a medium or large bowl, beat together the sugar and egg yolks until light and fluffy with the whisk attachment (because I have that now!). Add the orange juice and zest and both the extracts and mix well. Using the paddle attachment, gradually mix the almonds and then the flour into the batter until combined. Set aside.

In a large bowl, whisk egg whites until soft peaks form. Add the salt and the last 3 tablespoons of sugar. Beat until stiff but not dry. Set aside.

Melt the butter. Fold the butter into the batter using a spatula. Then gently fold in the egg whites, being careful not to deflate the whites. Pour batter into the two pans and bake for about 35 minutes, until cooked through. Let cool for 15 minutes. Turn out on a wire rack to cool completely.

Crumb Coat:

1 cup powdered sugar

orange juice

Put powdered sugar in a small bowl. Pour orange juice into the bowl one tablespoon or so at a time (very slowly). Mix with a fork between each tablespoon. Add enough liquid to make the icing runny, but still viscous. It should be about as thick as corn syrup. Pour onto the cooled cake that has already been stacked (if it's a two- or three-layer cake). Let dry.

Buttercream Frosting:

1 1/3 cup vegetable shortening

2 tablespoons meringue powder

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1/2 teaspoon butter flavoring

1/2 teaspoon salt

5 or 6 tablespoons water

2 pounds powdered sugar (!)

In a mixing bowl, cream the shortening with the paddle attachment of a standing mixer (or just any old attachment for you commoners without a KitchenAid, yes, I'm already a snob). Add the meringue powder, vanilla and butter flavoring, salt and 5 tablespoons of water. Mix until smooth consistency. Add the powdered sugar one-third at a time. I left out probably 1/2 to 1 whole cup of the directed amount of powdered sugar and the consistency was totally fine (this was according to some tips from one of my aunts).

Add more water as needed to get the right consistency to frost a cake and/or make silly decorations like the roses and leaves (don't even ask me how to know what consistency is right).

Taking the Cake

Now for what's become a once-weekly installment of cooking. I must be a glutton for being busy--once my university class was over I signed up for a cake decorating class. I just replace one thing with another. The class started last week and meets at Mangelson's, a local craft store and actually my first employer way back 10 or 11 years ago. I walk through the aisles, which have been slightly rearranged and recall sorting shopping carts filled with beads and rhindstones. The store still has a popcorn machine.

Tonight's class should be interesting: I have to bring an already-frosted cake. I have never once been able to properly frost a cake--not ever--and I've had numerous chances. I've had cakes break apart on me, I've made frosting too runny, I've ran out of frosting midway through, you name the disaster involving the sugary-glue and I've done it. This time, I swear to follow the instructions. I'm going to make a crumb layer, and I'll even use Crisco instead of butter. My poor mom is perpetually the recipient of my awful cakes. She's the only one who would appreciate these efforts anyway. Get ready to be stunned mom--this one's for you.

This is what I'm aiming for: (I'll keep you posted on my progress)

Boozy Cake for the Kids

I've been meaning to make this cake for months now, but whenever I make sweets they end up sticking around the apartment until they're rock solid, moldy or attract flies (that happened with the apple pie, it's gross, I know). Sunday afternoon, I had a feeling of emerging from winter, ragged and weather-beaten but still alive. Plus, I felt a little celebratory: After more than 10 years of attending my church, I finally completed the membership class to officially join. Can we say committment problem? Actually, I don't think I have committment issues; I just take it seriously. I don't want to commit, even to something small like going to a movie with friends on a Friday night, if I don't think I'll be able to follow through. So yesterday, I became the last member of my family to join West Hills, and it felt like a big deal. Like something that should be commemorated with a cake.

Yesterday was actually the 50th anniversary of the church, making it that much more special to me. The charter members (so the first people to join the church 50 years ago) came up with the new members, and I (almost teary) just thought of how thankful I am that all those people stuck with the church for 50 years--I can't even conceive of that amount of time. I am so blessed because of their faithfulness. I just love my church; it's filled with people who are so honest about their faith, which is such a rare gem these days. These people are not looking for easy answers to life's questions, and I love that. And they wouldn't care that I poured a whole cup of amaretto liqueur into this cake and served it to the high school students--not that that's at all edgy considering the alcohol was completely cooked out, but I'm sure someone out there would have scoffed.

The cake is supposed to go in a bundt pan, which I do not own. Two cake rounds worked out fine, plus I got to use the two cake stands I got for my birthday. Oh it was so good. Almost like a brownie with a crunchy crust. The almond flavoring from the amaretto really came out, and it is chocolatey in the best sense--as in not milk-chocolate sweet, but dark, bitter and complex. While I was mixing it, I kept wanting to stop after each step because the batter already tasted so good. I'm glad I went all the way.

Chocolate-Amaretto Cake: aka Boozy Cake from Orangette

5 ounces unsweetened chocolate

1/4 cup instant espresso powder

2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

1 cup amaretto liqueur (alternatively whiskey, bourbon or kirsch brandy)

2 sticks butter, softened

2 cups granulated sugar

3 large eggs

1 tablespoon vanilla extract

1 teaspoon baking soda

2 cups flour

powdered sugar and almond slivers for garnishing

Preheat oven to 325. Melt chocolate using a double boiler or fill a pot of water a little bit, place a glass or heat-resistant bowl in the pot, bring the water to a soft boil and melt the chocolate in the glass bowl.

In a medium-size bowl, combine the espresso and cocoa powders. Pour about a 1/2 cup of boiling water into the bowl, blend the powders until they've completely dissolved. Pour in the liqueur. Orangette recommends whiskey or bourbon, but I didn't have either (not a big whiskey fan). I love the flavor of amaretto though.

In a large bowl, mix the butter with an electric beater until creamy. Add the sugar and blend until smooth. Add each of the eggs, one at a time. Add the vanilla and baking soda and blend again. Pour in the melted chocolate and mixture until smooth. Pour in one-third of the boozy mixture, blend. Dump in one cup of flour, blend. Pour in half of the remaining boozy mixture, blend. Add the last cup of flour, blend. Add the last of the amaretto, blend. Transfer batter to two 8- or 9-inch cake rounds or one bundt pan--well greased all around. Bake for 55 minutes in the cake rounds or for 1 hour and 10 minutes in the bundt. Garnish with powdered sugar and almonds to fancy it up.

More Blueberries

Here we go again, more blueberries. You can see the nuances of my obsessiveness even in what I eat. I find something I like and I get as much of it as I possibly can until I'm practically sick of it or it starts to feel trapped--or in the case of food, it goes out of season. I do it when I buy a new album; I do it when I get new clothes; and even in the history of this blog I've obsessed over squash, mushrooms, almonds, cranberries, marsala and now blueberries. These are all moves I will never regret. And this cake just might be the pinnacle of my experimentation in blueberries.

The recipe was featured in Gourmet's July issue, and I sort of just passed over it, until I saw it on the blog Cucina Nicolina. It's funny, for those of you not fully entrenched in the world of the food blog, but I get a lot of inspiration from seeing what other people make on their blogs. I have a number of cookbooks and magazines at home filled with great recipes, but for whatever reason I see these things as if in real time and I think: "Oh yeah, that looks good. I can totally make that." Whereas when Jamie Oliver publishes a new cookbook, I gaze longingly at the pages of beautifully photographed, delicious food with inspirational recipes to go along with and I love it, but I also think "What the hell are courgettes and when am I ever going to eat a lamb shank for dinner?" Not kidding. When I bought the Jamie at Home cookbook, I went through and googled quite a list of ingredients I had never heard of--only to discover courgettes is British for zucchini.

In that vein, this cake requires no less than four mixing bowls. But it's totally doable. And completely delicious. I made it to take to Aaron and Laura's tonight, but I'm pulling this trick where I pre-cut the cake so no one will know that Megan and I already ate a couple pieces. We were in the kitchen last night licking the beaters, spatula and bowl. This cake--moist, sweet and addictive.

Coming up next on Food Eaten I'll finally make granola with the help of Sprouted Kitchen and I'll have a go at these green beans from Food Loves Writing. And later I'll ponder why I never cook with meat.

Blueberry Streusel Cake: adapted from Gourmet
Streusel:
1 cup flour
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon brown sugar
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon granulated sugar
3/4 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 stick cold butter, cut into 1/2-inch slices
almonds (just a suggestion)

Cake:
1 cup flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup plain yogurt (Gourmet suggests sour cream)
3/4 teaspoon vanilla
3/4 cup granulated sugar
1/2 stick softened butter
1 egg
3 cups blueberries

Preheat oven to 350. Gourmet suggests lining a 9x9 pan with aluminum foil, which I did not do but now realize it was to pull the cake cleanly out of the pan without it crumbling.

For streusel topping, combine flour, sugars and cinnamon in a medium bowl. Cut in the butter and blend using a pastry blender until mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Set aside.

In a medium bowl, combine flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Set aside. In a small bowl, combine yogurt and vanilla. In a large bowl, beat sugar and butter together with an electric mixer until creamy. Add the egg and beat until smooth. Alternately combine flour and yogurt mixtures to the batter beating until smooth each time until completely incorporated. Be sure to taste batter frequently--just to make sure it's OK. Using a spatula, stir blueberries into the batter.

Pour batter into your pan. Gourmet suggests using a 9x9. I used a 9x12-inch pan because I need to feed (potentially) a lot of peope--I'm trying to trick them into thinking they're getting a large piece of dessert. If you use a 9x12-inch pan, you won't need to bake it as long.

Resume pouring batter into pan. Top the batter with 1/2 of the crumbled streusel. Bake for 25 minutes. Remove from oven and add the remaining streusel to the cake and bake for another 20 to 25 minutes in a 9x9-inch pan or 15 to 20 minutes in a 9x12-inch pan. Just bake until it's cooked through.

Crummy Chocolate Cake

My mom has been making Crummy Chocolate Cake for years, though it hasn't always been named as such. In fact, now that I search my memory, the first I can recall of the chocolate cake is the date of its naming. Before that, it was just any chocolate cake. Now, it's our chocolate cake. I must have been in fifth grade at the time. I was still in elementary school and Baby Emily was around, so I was probably eleven. Mom made the chocolate cake to bring as a treat for Pioneer Girls Club at church. The cake was sitting out on the counter while we were eating dinner, my dad still dressed in his suit from a day at work. We got up to leave and probably pack Emily in a car seat, my mom was driving the carpool and we grabbed the chocolate cake--to the befuddlement of Dad. "Where was it going? What, no cake for dessert?" And then, disappointed and (rightfully) a touch upset, the now infamous statement came out: "I didn't get one piece of that crummy chocolate cake!" (You don't separate that man from his chocolate.) Mom whisked the cake away, to the enjoyment of all the girls and volunteers at church and left Dad at home. But the next day, there was another cake just for him--only now dubbed Crummy Chocolate Cake. And my poor dad, being the only male among four women, has been teased, poked and prodded endlessly about it. I suppose it's no coincidence this cake was made in honor of his birthday a week ago. But he's not the only one who loves the Crummy Chocolate Cake. We all love it so much that one piece isn't enough. You can see my mom doing her trademark snitch of a quarter piece of cake. All us girls do it. And a quarter soon becomes a half which soon becomes a whole. Oh but it's so good.

Crummy Chocolate Cake: (not to be confused with Crumby)
1 cup butter 3 tablespoon cocoa 1 cup hot water 2 cups flour 2 cups sugar 1 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon baking soda 2 eggs 1/2 cup buttermilk Frosting: 1/2 cup butter, softened 3 tablespoons cocoa 3 tablespoons milk 1 teaspoon vanilla 1 pound powdered sugar Pre-heat oven to 350. Combine butter, cocoa and hot water in saucepan. Heat over medium until butter has melted. Combine dry ingredients in mixing bowl. Add butter mixture to bowl and stir until well blended. Blend in eggs and buttermilk. Pour batter into jelly roll size pan (bigger than 11x13). Bake for 20 minutes. Mix frosting and pour over cooled cake (this is very important, the icing won't set if the cake is hot). Emily always asks for more frosting.

French-style Yogurt Cake

I nursed a craving for orange-flavored baked goods all last week. It wasn't until Saturday that I had time to fulfill it. This is another recipe from Orangette Molly's A Homemade Life, which you all should read. (With additional inspiration from my friend Jess at Cake and Cup.) The weekend was simply great. I had the apartment to myself and spent Saturday cleaning and then rewarded myself by baking, and I even squeezed in some time to write before heading off to a slumber party at Sarah's (yes, I'm 25 and going to slumber parties--I love my life). I do such a horrible job of scheduling time for writing what I want to write (aside from the contents of this blog). I have mastered the art of procrastination. I have two stories due at work this week for trips I went on about a year ago. I turned in a story to The Reader yesterday that was originally due on Friday at 8 a.m. Without an impending deadline and a serious time crunch, I cannot produce. But what I do produce under the time crunch is probably not as good as if I started earlier.

Baking is different. You can procrastinate and you could try to make shortcuts, but everyone will know. Baking takes a set amount of time. In this case, prep time (which is a bit more subjective) and then 35 minutes to bake. And that's it. It's time you either have or you don't.

French Yogurt Cake with Orange: from Orangette 1 1/2 cup all-purpose flour 2 teaspoons baking powder dash of salt 2 teaspoons orange zest 1/2 cup whole-milk yogurt (plain) 1 cup granulated sugar 3 large eggs 1/2 cup canola or vegetable oil 1 tablespoon orange juice For Syrup: 1/4 cup orange juice 1/4 cup powdered sugar For Icing: 1/2 cup powdered sugar 2 tablespoons orange juice Preheat oven to 350. Butter the bottom of a 9-inch round cake pan. In a medium bowl, stir together flour, baking powder, salt and orange zest. In a large mixing bowl, whisk together yogurt, sugar and eggs until smooth consistency. Add the dry ingredients and stir. Pour in the oil and mix. Drop in just a dollop of orange juice. Pour batter into cake pan and bake on center rack for 25 to 35 minutes--my oven always takes 35.

Meanwhile, in a small bowl, whisk the powdered sugar and orange juice for the syrup. When cake is finished, pull out of oven and let cool for 15 minutes. Dump out onto a plate, flip right side up on to another plate and transfer to wire rack--which, as of this recipe, I decided I must invest in. Place a piece of parchment paper under the rack. While the cake is still a bit warm, pour the syrup over it. In the same small bowl, mix together the powdered sugar and the juice for the icing. Pour over cooled cake while it's still on the wire rack. Allow icing to set and then carefully transfer cake to serving platter.

Chocolate Cake

The second of the Easter desserts is another of Molly's recipes from A Homemade Life. I had been plotting out three desserts for the holiday meal for maybe even weeks in advance. I was going to do two of yesterday's Orange Upside-down cake and tomorrow's strawberry tart. But Thursday night I came across Molly's Winning Hearts and Minds Cake at the end of her book and knew it was exactly what was needed. (If one can actually need dessert.)

I think I may have made a mistake. A cake that goes by the name "Winning Hearts and Minds" perhaps shouldn't be the accompaniment to a fancy, orange cake and an even fancier strawberry-mascarpone tart. It will be over-shadowed because, even though it is chocolate, it's just chocolate. There is no drizzled caramel syrup, no snicker's bars, no crushed oreos and no mocha flavoring. It's just a (nearly flourless) chocolate cake. One that, according to Molly, has magical powers of persuasion. We're all in need of a little help in winning hearts and minds, not least of all me. And if this cake helped Molly along in that direction, it can't hurt, even if all I'm doing is embodying the spirit of the chocolate cake.

Molly's Winning Hearts and Minds Cake: from Orangette 7 ounces unsweetened chocolate, broken into smaller pieces 7 ounces (1 3/4 cups) unsalted butter, cut into 1/2-inch cubes 1 cup plus 2 tablespoons granulated sugar 5 eggs 1 tablespoon flour And I threw in some orange zest because I felt like it.

Molly suggests to either melt the chocolate in the microwave or on a double boiler. I haven't ever had success with melting chocolate in the microwave--it always burned. And double boiler's sound complicated and expensive--they're not. I use a medium skillet filled halfway up with water and then place a bowl on top of the skillet, as if the bowl were a lid put on upside down. I just so happen to have a bowl that fits perfectly inside my medium skillet. Be sure the water in the skillet doesn't touch the bottom of the glass bowl. And voila, double boiler.

Preheat oven to 375. Bring the water in the skillet to a boil. In the bowl melt the chocolate pieces and the butter completely, stirring continuously. Stir in the sugar and orange zest (if you want). Remove chocolate from heat (carefully). Whisk in eggs one at a time. Stir in the flour. Transfer to a greased 9-inch round cake pan. Bake in oven for 20 to 25 minutes, checking periodically the last five minutes.

My cake puffed up really big in the oven, which (needlessly) made me nervous. I am constantly afraid of under-cooking baked goods. You'll know the cake is done when the top is cracked and the middle jiggles only a little when you shake it. Allow cake to cool and it will probably lose the puffiness. Turn out onto a plate and then turn again onto a serving platter. This cake is freezable.

Orange Upside-down Cake

I went all out for Easter this week. In fact, everyone went all out. I had a half-day of work on Friday and spent my afternoon baking. I can't think of a better way to spend a few free hours, well at least off the top of my head. Joanie and Doug spent all of Saturday smoking the beautiful salmon pictured below. It was so good, it led my mother to loudly declare "I could eat salmon all day," in response to Jason's pensive ponderings on why he loves studying philosophy. Jason said something like, "Philosophy is something I'm really passionate about." And my mom (basically) said (in no small voice), "I'm passionate about eating." Katy was laughing so hard she started crying. To be fair, the salmon was good. (The creme fraiche-ish recipe is also listed below). We had a fun afternoon cramming a dog underneath the table and 13 people around it, even though we were missing my sister Allison. After dessert and ridiculously strong coffee, a group of us rolled ourselves out of the house and down to the park to play croquet. We sort of look like a J. Crew catalog in our Easter best (aside from my house slippers). Even Shelby enjoyed croquet. She frolicked from person to person asking to be petted and didn't even try to steal any of the balls. Orange Upside-down Cake is dessert one of three that I made for the holiday meal. This one was probably the sweetest and the most like a regular cake. Sweet with a subtle note of orange (sounds like perfume). And look how pretty with the caramelized oranges on top. My little sister Emily would not eat them even though I swore they were edible. "It's like candy, Emily." Megan, champion convincer, even joined in. "Emily, it's good. Just try it. Try it." She did. But even Megan couldn't convince her to try the asparagus. Orange Upside-down Cake: inspired by Gourmet Magazine 1 orange 3/4 cup sugar 3/4 cup water orange zest 1 1/2 cups flour 1 1/2 teaspoon baking powder 1 teaspoon baking soda 1/2 teaspoon salt 1 stick unsalted butter 2 large eggs 1 1/2 teaspoon orange zest 3/4 cup buttermilk To caramelize oranges, slice orange into 1/4-inch thick pieces. In a skillet, cover with cold water and bring to a boil. Drain and set aside. In the same skillet, add sugar, water and orange zest and bring to a simmer, stirring until sugar has dissolved. Put orange slices back into the water and simmer gently until water has reduced and is syrupy. Should take 30 to 40 minutes. Remove orange slices with a fork and place in the bottom of greased 9-inch round cake pan. Pour syrup over oranges. Preheat oven to 350. In a medium mixing bowl, blend together flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt. In a separate bowl, mix sugar and butter until smooth. Add eggs one at a time and mix until smooth. Add in orange zest and mix. (I bought the cutest citrus zester at Target for like $3 on Friday, best buy ever!) Alternately, add dry mixture and buttermilk to the wet mixture until fully incorporated. Pour batter into the cake pan that already has the orange slices and syrup in it. Bake for 25 to 30 minutes. Allow to cool and dump cake onto serving dish. Creme Fraiche for Smoked Salmon: sour cream chopped red onion capers parsley Mix all the ingredients together.

Buttermilk Coffee Cake

After I cut myself I still had to make something to bring to work the following day. We have this thing at the office called the Breakfast Club, for which one person from a group about 10 of us brings breakfast every Friday morning. So not as cool as this Breakfast Club, but not too shabby. I signed up to have an excuse to bake something and share it, except that whenever it's my turn I forget until the last minute and have to run to HyVee to pick up a bunch of muffins. Or like last week when you do something like cut my finger with a knife, take a half-day holiday at the last minute and don't feel like cooking anything because it the busiest week of your life. (Remember how I exaggerate.)

But being the genius that I am, I knew all this would happen ahead of time. Thus in anticipation of my Thursday-evening bloodbath, I called my friend (and baking goddess) Sarah to come hang out and help me. That's her in the above photo doing all the work while I watched and gave directions (one of my favorite things), oh and made a mess of the flour. The recipe comes from my Better Homes and Gardens baking cookbook. Sarah doubted its deliciousness, declaring she had a killer coffee cake recipe at home. But I think I converted her in the end.

Buttermilk Coffee Cake: from Better Homes and Gardens
2 1/2 cups flour
1 1/2 cups brown sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
2/3 cup butter
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
2 eggs
1 1/3 cup buttermilk

Preheat oven to 350. In a large mixing bowl, combine flour, sugar and salt. Cut in the butter with a pastry blender until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Set aside 1/2 cup of the flour-sugar combo. Stir in baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon and nutmeg. In a separate bowl, whisk together eggs and buttermilk.

For those who don't have buttermilk just lying around, a cup of regular milk combined with a teaspoon of vinegar or lemon juice will do the trick.

Combine wet and dry mixtures. Spoon batter into 13x9-inch baking tray. Bake for 35 to 40 minutes.

Birthday Wishes

So Monday was my birthday. The day marking the monumental 25th birthday has come and gone with less pomp and circumstance than an ego-centric, attention-loving person such as myself would hope for in her wildest dreams. And thus begins what I have decided will be the best year of my life to date. Highlights: Emily made me a birthday cake (How freaking cute is she?! Fifteen-year-old following in her older sister's footsteps, improvising cake recipes and everything.) My other sister (Al) made me an ottoman. And not, as you may be imagining, a piece of wood nailed to some planks. It looks like it should be sold at Target, nay, Pottery Barn, on third thought, it is way too cool for all of those places. For dinner, we went out for Thai food at Thai Spice. Yum. Emily ordered phad thai--and liked it. She said while looking at the menu, "I don't like Chinese food." What?! Who doesn't like Americanized Chinese food? It's fried and loaded with sugar and salt. After we teased her for being too picky, I thought we were in trouble for sure. But she ate nearly half of the phad thai and left the remainder in my fridge.

Here's an almost really cute photo of me and Megan. Except for my wonky eye!!!! Which I totally deserve because just last night I was making fun of this girl-who-dated-this-boy-I-really-liked's eye while looking at her facebook profile. Karma.

Al and I both ordered green curry, which was good and spicy (but not this spicy). And while it was good and savory and everything great about green curry, it's still not Pee Lek's green curry. No one makes green curry like your adopted Thai mother.

You may be scrolling through these photos and thinking "Wow, it looks like Lainey and her sisters and roommate are having a splendid time." (We did). "But where are her parents?" Strange, where are those sires on such a momentus occasion? Did Lainey finally achieve her lifelong dream of becoming an orphan just like her childhood heroes Annie, Anne of Green Gables and Heidi? No. The padres skipped town on a "much needed" holiday to swoosh down ski slopes and purchase cowboy boots in Steamboat Springs, Colo. Before I am the recipient of an enormous guilt trip in a few hours (Does this post hit too close to home? Is it too soon?), let me digress.

My birthday is never fails to turn into a giant family drama, pitting me against my dear-and-loving mother with my sisters caught in the middle and my dad (the supposed) true cause of it all (not sure I believe that). Last year on my birthday we were in the car for 12 hours (granted it was on the way to go skiing in Colorado ... details). The year before that, hey, it was pretty good. The year before that--another 12-hour car ride. The year before that, January blizzard that shut down the entire city.

I, of course, never miss a chance to make these people feel bad about slighting me on the one day a year that we can universally acknowledge is all about me. But seriously, I get the shaft (except for those legendary birthday parties sledding at Mahoney State Park back in elementary school).

Now, I know that my birthday comes on the day that the holidays are officially over. Everybody is going back to school/work. It's cold out. We've all eaten more than we should, shopped more than we like and gone to more parties than is reasonable. Yet I reserve the right to be irritated that my padres left town on purpose (maybe), so they didn't have to celebrate. And weren't even nice about it.

My one consolation: knowing that they would have had way more fun on vacation with me and my sisters because we are hilarious.

And here's a random photo of icing ...